Begin with Yourself : The Journey of Finding a Relationship

from www.dailyom.com

The journey to finding a relationship is just that, a journey that uses all of our life wisdom and experiences.

Before we embark upon the journey of finding the relationship that is right for us, we may want to take the opportunity to refine our concept of who we are and our ideas of what we want from life. That way, we are clearer on the kind of person we want to attract into our lives. Part of the journey of finding a mate is learning how to become our own mate. When we can learn to meet our needs without relying on someone else to complete us, we don’t have to form relationships from the space of needing our emptiness to be filled. We can also discover our intrinsic value, separate from what someone else might be reflecting back to us. Getting to know who we are and learning to love ourselves creates a solid foundation of self that we can bring to any relationship.

We are fortunate to live in a time when relationships can unfold at a pace that is right for us and take unique forms. Friendship, dating, open relationships, long term relationships, long distance relationships, or committed relationships — we are free to choose the kind of relationships that we want. If you want to be in relationship, but haven’t found the right one for you, remember that the universe works in perfect order and, therefore, right now your life is unfolding exactly as it is meant to be. Maybe all this time has been part of your preparation period for meeting your intended partner. Even the relationships in our lives that haven’t worked out as we had hoped serve us by teaching us to make better choices in our next relationships.

Finding the relationship we want can come early or later in life. It may even happen again and again in one lifetime. There is no right or wrong for how to find a relationship nor is there a timeline that you have to follow. Follow your heart, listen to your inner voice, continue to become your own soul mate, and stay open to love. The journey of finding the right relationship begins with being in right relationship with yourself.

The Yoga of Relationships

An article by Phillip Moffitt. He is a member of the Spirit Rock Teachers' Council in Woodacre, California, and teaches vipassana meditation at Turtle Island Yoga center in San Rafael, California.


I sat silently as the woman self-consciously settled herself onto the couch in my office. She was in her 30s, married, well established in her profession, and a sincere student of the dharma. She looked up after a few moments of reflection, smiled nervously, and said, "I guess you wonder why I'm here. I know you don't normally do these kinds of meetings with students, but I don't need an interview about my practice; I need a perspective on my personal life." I had recently worked intensely with this woman at a retreat, where she had told me she was in therapy and that it had been helpful in her life and practice. She was confident and very self-reliant, so I knew she would not casually ask for an appointment. "So let's hear it," I replied.